Confessions Of An Indy Whore

Have any of you heard about this movie coming out, I think in May or something, it’s called “Illinois Jones and The Kindom of Crystal Gayle” or something like that? Looks cool, but I dunno… it might suck…

Of course I’m kidding. Indiana Jones has been lurking at the back of my mind for so long, I can fart the “The Raiders March”.

Okay, not really, but that would be kinda funny.

The point, anyway, is this: Indy has been a part of my life for almost as long as I can remember. I can distinctly remember going to see “Raiders Of The Lost Ark” with my best friend, Brendan O’Connell, in 1981… only to find all the showings were sold out for the rest of the day. I had one of those “hear the chime, turn the page” read-along-to-the-record adaptations (although the chime sound was replaced by the sound of Indy’s whip). I had an Indiana Jones action figure, that was stolen by the neighborhood bully… in his place, he left a pants-less Dungeons & Dragons wizard figure. Jerkstore.

So here I am, feeling like a kid again as I wait breathlessly for “Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull” (unfortunately long title, I think). As I watched the trailer a few weeks back, my wife gazed in awe at my idiot-grin, my slightly misty eyes, and she didn’t get it. That’s ok, I get it.

And as the juggernaut grows closer to opening day, I can’t help but get a little giddy. It’s the return of my first pulp-hero (who was pulp before I knew what pulp was), and there’s a ton of promotional items I can’t help but ogle. New Indy toys (finally, a chance to replace that long-mourned stolen figure). New Indy comic books. And yes, I may even buy the Indy cereal. It looks like Coco Puffs with marshmallows… good stuff.

Oh, man. This is a new low for me, isn’t it?

God help me, I’m a marketing whore!

I am Indy's bitch.

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I draw the line at Indy cereal.

    But not Batman cereal.

  2. Dude, with Batman you never draw the line.

    And I don’t mean you personally, I mean that no one ever should draw the line when it comes to Batman.


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